Tuesday, September 11, 2007

No News

We have been wrapped up in finding our new "normal" now that school is in full swing for everyone. And since I don't have the use of my Mac right now I'll be posting less. But I will be sure to post things on the boys' blog about Kevin's preschool and about our home schooling adventures.

And lately I've felt the need to stimulate my brain. I'm actually going to try my hand at reading... yep reading. It's certainly not my favorite past time. In fact, I would rather do dishes than read, but I feel like I have severely dumbed down since... highschool. So here I go.

I might have a book review to post next... in a few... weeks. :)

Stay tuned.

Thursday, September 6, 2007

Only in my world...

When I was in high school we sang a song called, "Everything Happens to Me". Basically it's the narative of someone with really awful luck who gets the brunt of life. And out of all of the things I choose not to remember about highschool, I remember that song, mainly because the choir I sang with dedicated it to me every time we performed it. Seriously, I was always the person who ran square into the monkey bars pole, threw ketsup all over my fellow diners while shaking the ketsup bottle, was six months behind "the style" or got the ticket for expired tabs the day they expired. And life just keeps on comin'.

It's true. I'm singin' a bit of a sad song right now... feelin' a little bit pitiful. But I have good reason.

I dropped my Macbook the other day. Yep, dropped it. All of you Mac users are gaspging and the PC users are laughing. Fair enough. But here's the kick. I took it into the Apple Store down town last night and took it to the Genius Bar (which is real time assistance for all things Mac). After 1.5 hours of watching the Genius take my baby apart, put it back together, plug things in, try different things and with the occasional grimace or puzzled "huh", he nearly cried when he told me that he could not start up my computer... that it is probably the main logic board (or mother board for PC users). That's right. It won't even boot up. This is neither an easy or inexpesive fix. - Maybe he almost cried because he saw the tears in my eyes. Maybe it's because he was very sad at the situation. He litterally said, "This is very rare... and very sad. I'm sorry. There's nothing more I can do for it."

I found myself thinking (and saying once), "All of my files are on there... everything is on there..." - The Genius kept saying he was so very sorry... He was sad for me.

So I'm bummed... really bummed.

But it got me to thinking... What am I supposed to learn from this, Lord? - Don't say it readers, I know what you are thinking, "You are supposed to learn how to keep ahold of things." That's funny but that's not what I'm talking about... What life lesson should I learn here? One about being materialistic? Am I materialistic? About being reliant on technology? About managing time and money well enough to be able to get the repairs done? What's the point here?

Well, what was the point of the lesson when I ran into the pole on the playground, or flung ketsup all over the diner, or got the ticket from the cop? Is there a lesson in it here? Or am I just inflicted with really bad luck?

Sunday, September 2, 2007

Where the Rubber Meets the Road

Church today at PUMP was different. There were a lot of people absent. In fact there were so many people absent that we didn't have our normal program for the neighborhood kids, no Sunday Bible Class and no lunch. Now, some who belong to PUMP might be asking themselves, "Why is she talking about this? How embarrassing." But hang with me here, there is a point...
Our preacher was out at a big youth rally in our area. Another of our ministers was out on vacation. Other PUMP members were out on their vacations, or sick, or whatever. 
I think I counted 6 adults that are regularly involved in the workings of our Sunday program. That's 6 out of about 20 who are there on a pretty regular basis; teaching, administrating, ministering, serving and preparing so that the kids in our neighborhood and members learn a little more about Jesus each week. So Logan lead worship. I put communion together. Ike left a pre-recorded DVD of his sermon (which I hope makes it to his blog). And that was PUMP this morning. But it was by no means a minimal experience.

 I realized this as I sat in worship singing that I had to focus on keeping a great feeling of anxiety at bay. Introducing myself to others is certainly not one of my strong suits... and this concerns me. I realized that I rely on the "A team" of our PUMP members to do what feels to me like the hard stuff of ministry... meeting people, inviting them into the PUMP family... inviting them to meet Jesus... and it broke my heart. I realized that after 2 years at PUMP I am still drinking a sort of spiritual milk. 

...still...

I know I have a choice to make... Yoda coined the phrase but Jesus said it first, "Do or do not, there is no try." 

So, this is where the rubber meets the road.